My addiction was more than just a step into a destructive, negative life. It was a leap towards the degradation of my moral, principles, and of my own person.
My addiction was completely selfish because I only cared about my own benefit, without once thinking about the consequences of my actions. In the past, my addition was impulsiveness, lack of responsibility, dishonesty, crime, disobedience, lies, and the lack of empathy and regret I had for my impulsive and criminal decisions.
This addiction was an escape, so I could hide from my fears, frustrations, insecurities, and my responsibilities. Yet, my addiction created a life without values, morals, and so full of confusion, fear, destruction, and insecurities that I terrorized my community with. My addiction led to wrong decisions and drugs.
The addiction of my life was falsehood, violence, pain, suffering, anger, fury, cowardness, and death.
It was chaos and a complete destruction of my life.
In my time of life of crime, I was a person that lived making impulsive and selfish decisions. I was a person that only cared about getting what I wanted, I only cared about myself without caring about the consequences they carried or who they hurt.
I was an emotionally unstable person. In turn, my behavior was anti-social, I caused fear and insecurity in my community with my criminal actions. I had no respect for authority, nor the laws placed. I lived an induced drugged state, out on the streets with an immoral behavior. Though I knew exactly right from wrong, I always chose wrong. I was an irresponsible, dishonest, unbearable, criminal, violent person. I had no empathy for my neighbor nor remorse for the damage I caused. I was completely destructive in my decisions and actions.
Now, I am a different person because I have continuous knowledge and conscience of the pain and suffering that I have caused innocent people. Today, I am a person that has fully accepted responsibility for cowardly murdering an innocent human being. I accept the irreversible and irreparable pain I have caused their family, friends, neighbors, and community. Today, I am a person that for the first time in my entire life, has taken responsibility of all the bad decisions, actions that I committed. Today, I act and think with honesty, responsibility, tolerance, empathy, and are conscience of the consequences have on others.
Still, I am a person that currently lives a life free of violence and drugs. I am determined to keep going to my rehabilitative group sessions, so that I may continue in the path of positive, constructive living. I do this for the betterment of my community and so that I may never cause such damage and suffering that I cause in my past life.